How to Plan a Perfect Sober Vacation

Most of us have limited PTO and a finite travel budget, and want to maximize them with a fun adventure or a relaxing getaway with minimal inconvenience. As a sober traveler, it’s also preferable to avoid having margaritas shoved in your face at every turn, and be able to fully experience and enjoy all of the food, culture, scenery and people that your destination has to offer. If you are new to sober travel, it might be tough to figure out how to plan your vacation, as most all-inclusives, cruises and tours often revolve around alcohol. Here are 11 steps to get the most out of your trip:

1. Choose a destination

Are you looking to hang out on the beach for a week? Explore a European city? Sail through fjords in Norway? Hike through mountains in New Zealand? Safari in Botswana? There are so many options out there, and everyone is different as far as their travel preferences.

Me? My top criteria when planning a vacation is awe-inspiring scenery. When I saw the insane photos of Plitvice Lakes National Park last year, I immediately booked a trip to Croatia. What is your top criteria?

Some websites I turn to when researching my next travel adventure are Goats on the Road, Travel and Leisure, Conde Nast Traveler, and Nomadic Matt. They all have great ideas, photos and advice to give you a better sense of each destination.

If you are new to recovery, you might want to steer clear of places known for their party scene and drinking culture–Key West or Ibiza, for example. You can always circle back to those places later if you are really dying to go.

Have a tough time deciding? Check out Sober Travel Ideas for more inspiration!

2. Decide when to go

There are quite a few things to consider when deciding when to go. Do you have kids and are you bringing them along? Is there a busy season at your job? What is your budget and would it be preferable to get more bang for your buck by traveling during the shoulder season? Is the weather pleasant at your chosen destination during the time frame you are targeting?

Ideally, all of these things line up. But often, you have to make trade-offs. Sometimes these trade-offs don’t work out, like when we booked a trip to Tenerife and Morocco in December and had to reschedule our entire trip for the following Spring because it was scheduled to rain for the entire 10 days we were going to be there! We ended up booking a week in Puerto Vallarta at the last minute instead. The weather was fantastic there but we also lost out on about $1,000 in re-booking and other fees.

3. Find your travel partner (or decide to go solo)

Tim and I are both sober, which makes it easy for us to travel together and not drink. I have also traveled with my parents, my sister, and friends who either don’t drink or are in recovery. It is simpler to travel with partners who are like-minded and interested in getting the same things out of the vacation as you are. If you don’t have anyone like that in your life, try a sober group travel company like We Love Lucid or Sober Vacations International. Or, travel solo!

Connect with like-minded sober travelers at the next Temperate Traveler Sober Retreat!

4, Book flights

Actually getting to your destination is often the most stressful aspect of the journey, but there are strategies for making it less so. I ALWAYS book direct flights when they are available, even if I have to pay a few hundred dollars more. There’s too much that can go wrong with connecting flights (delayed first leg could mean missing your second leg, bad weather or mechanical problems could strand you at the connecting airport) and it also extends the amount of time en route, cutting into your valuable time at your intended destination.

The airport you select is important as well. I live in Central New Jersey, which means I have my choice of Philadelphia International, Newark Liberty and Trenton Mercer. For most flights I choose Newark, because they have the largest selection of direct international flights for the best price. Rarely is Philadelphia a better option. Newark also provides the additional benefit of avoiding city traffic, so I can accurately predict how long it will take me to get there. Trenton Mercer is my favorite and I use it for domestic flights to Atlanta and Florida, because it’s 15 minutes from my house and it takes me 5 seconds to get through security. When I lived in San Jose, I usually went to Mineta International because it was a quick car ride away and it usually wasn’t busy. San Francisco International had the most direct flights but you might get stuck in traffic even though it’s 15 minutes outside of downtown. Do your research to see if you have multiple airport options that may be more convenient for you.

The timing of your flight is also of note. Morning flights are less likely to be delayed. If you have a late flight scheduled, you’ll want to book a hotel instead of an Airbnb or VRBO so you won’t have to worry about chasing down the owner late at night.

5. Research your chosen location

What will you do at your destination once you get there? How far are the different activities from each other? Where are the hotels or potential vacation rentals located in regards to these? Will you need to rent a car or is there cheap and available public transportation, taxis or Ubers? Are there any unsafe areas you want to avoid? Where is the nightlife located? These are all questions you want to explore before you book anything!

While I research all of our trips, I’ve made mistakes that cost us money. We had to move out of not one, but two Airbnbs in the past year due to the location being unbearably noisy. In San Juan, Puerto Rico, we found ourselves in a loft on a party street that had paper-thin walls. Groups of drunk revelers decided to park themselves on our stoop and scream at each other at 2am every night. If we had stayed longer than 3 nights we would have moved then too.

6. Book accommodations

A recent debate has been Airbnb vs. hotels. After being enamored with Airbnbs for several years, the pendulum has swung in the other direction for me. In most cities, vacation rentals are no longer the cheaper option. In most rural areas that still may be the case, so a cabin near a lake is your best bet, especially if you are bringing your family and bringing equipment like kayaks. If you are going with a vacation rental company like Airbnb or VRBO, I suggest booking close to the brand-name hotels in the area, as they have done the market research for you and chose that location because it is closest to all of the activities and amenities.

That being said, I have never had a poor experience at a Marriott or Hilton. They typically have nice rooms, good service and well-equipped gyms. For short trips to festivals, to see family or a long weekend getaway, I love mid-tier, 3-star hotels like Marriott Courtyard, Hampton Inn and DoubleTree. I’ve always had a pleasant experience and they give you free breakfast, mini fridges and microwaves, which help you to stay within budget. One note of caution: 3-star hotels are not the same quality outside of the US. For instance, our 3-star rated hotel in Dubrovnik would have been a 2-star in, say, Miami. When researching and booking hotels, Booking.com is my go-to. They always have the best prices, their maps are helpful, and when you use them regularly you qualify for “Genius” discounts.

7. Figure out transportation

If you are road-tripping, your transportation is pretty much set. If you are flying, you will need to get to the airport and from the airport from your house, from the airport and to the airport while at your destination, and be able to get around during your trip.

Unless it’s the Trenton Mercer Airport and I can roll my suitcase 3 feet and arrive at the terminal from the parking lot, I typically get a family member to drive or share an Uber with my travel partner. I also don’t use rental cars unless absolutely necessary because of how much of a hassle they are and the potential for getting ripped off. In places like Mexico City, Ubers are ridiculously cheap and plentiful. In cities such as London and Istanbul, public transport is safe, reliable and affordable. It’s much better to utilize these modes of transportation instead of attempting to navigate congested, foreign cities in a manual transmission Peugot. If there is an attraction you’d like to visit that isn’t accessible by car share, taxi or public transportation, there are often tours on Viator or Tripadvisor that will bring you there.

8. Build your itinerary

When I visit a place like Puerto Vallarta, where I have probably been on every tour listed on Tripadvisor, and members of The Fit Club recognized me from the last few times I was there, I take it easy and don’t plan anything. I am basically there to enjoy warm weather, eat churros and tacos from street carts and take naps on the balcony while listening to the waves crash. Sometimes you just need a break.

For a once-in-a-lifetime trip, where you’ve spent $2k on a flight and 10 days of paid time off, you definitely want to maximize every second you are there but also recognize that you won’t enjoy it if you are hungry, angry or tired. With travel, jet lag often affects me differently than I think it will, getting to and from places always takes longer than anticipated, and delightful surprises arise when I give myself time and space to experience them. The first few big trips I ever took were to San Francisco, California and to Portugal. The itineraries were jam-packed, which resulted in me being tired and cranky and bickering with my travel partner over where we should eat. Now, I plan one activity per day. That gives us the ability to rest, change plans, hit a recovery meeting, or check out that restaurant across town that someone texted us about this morning. When researching things to do, I often turn to Viator. It’s a website that lists tours, activities and experiences in a specific destination as well as reviews from travelers who bought them. You can filter by type of tour and time of day and you can use the Reserve Now, Pay Later feature so you don’t have to try to claw back your refund if your plans change.

That being said, in order to have a fun sober vacation, I need some sort of plan. Doing research, including utilizing a blog like Temperate Traveler to find fun, non-alcohol-centric things to do is essential for keeping FOMO at bay. It will also provide amazing memories that I can reminisce about for the rest of my life, memories that drinkers miss when they are hiding out in bars and clubs every afternoon and evening and hungover by the pool the next day.

9. Confirm and double-check

As an elder millenial who used to print out MapQuest maps to drive to my friends’ houses in high school, I keep a physical folder where I print out and keep all of my bookings. It’s also where I keep my passport, visa and other important documents. Sometimes the internet isn’t super reliable overseas so it’s better for me to keep physical copies just in case!

Make sure your bank is aware you are traveling and that you purchased an international plan with your phone carrier, if you are traveling out of the country.

10. Pack

Two years ago, after airlines had lost my luggage on multiple occasions, I bought a bag that fit the specifications for carry-on luggage so that I would never have to check a bag again. Since shoes take up the most room, I bring 2 pairs: one for running/hiking, and a pair of casual shoes. I can’t tell you how many times I brought nice heels or boots that I literally never wore, because tourists dress slovenly even if they are at a nice restaurant. If we are staying in a hotel, I bring minimal toiletries. I also bring one or two sweaters or sweatshirts because it inevitably gets cold at some point. I don’t bring a purse. Instead I use a backpack as my “personal item” and stash it with snacks, books, my folder with my passport and bookings, and my laptop. And I am ready to travel!

11, Get excited!

So you’ve checked off all the boxes and you are ready to go. Congrats! You are prepared to have a magnificent sober travel experience that you will always remember. Instead of talking about the swim up bar and cocktails you drank, you’ll regale your friends with tales of scuba diving in the Caribbean, or climbing a mountain in California, or sampling the cuisine in Vietnam. Enjoy!